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Episode 22: My Funny Valentine

Penny stood patiently at the photocopier, waiting for the never-ending stream of emails to print.  How many trees had been destroyed for the sake of her legal record keeping, Penny wondered. But soon, her thoughts went elsewhere. Nothing could perturb Penny on this fine day, as it was Valentine’s Day and her husband had grand plans to take her for a fine dinner at a fancy location. Or so he said.

Once the printing had ended, Penny picked up the stack of paper in the printing tray and flicked through it to check if there were any strays.

Email. Email. Email. Pleadings. Email. Email. Scoupon voucher. Email. Email. Letter. Email. Letter. Email. Email.

And then Penny came across this:

Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

I booked us a dinner…

And breakfast for two! 

As Penny cast her gaze over the coloured piece of writing, Asha and Alisha walked by.  Penny thrust the paper in front of the girls before they could complete their journey to the break-out room for their morning coffee and gossip session.

“Look what I found!”

Asha took the paper out of Penny’s hand and giggled.

“Oh how romantic.”

“That is the worst Valentine of all time.”

Whilst the girls giggled among themselves, he creeped up to the photocopier unannounced and discreetly inspected the photocopier tray. He found the tray was empty and did a quick survey of the area, his search ending on the paper in Asha’s hands. He quickly snatched the document from Asha.

“Ahhh…. sorry… ummm.. that’s…. ahhhh…..”

With the document in hand, he shuffled back to his office with his head down to the ground.  The girls bent over in stitches, laughing and wiping the tears out of their eyes. Then Asha and Alisha resumed their journey and Penny headed back to her office.

As she entered her office, Penny heard Tiffany’s high pitch scream reverberate through the hallway.

“Ahhhhhhhh, what the f_____!”

Penny was about to turn to see what the commotion was, when she noticed something on her chair. Two long stems, wrapped in clear celophane, each tied with a gold ribbon. A Rose and a Violet.

Penny was perturbed.

She knew she didn’t need to check the card, as she was sure she had read it just moments before. And it certainly wasn’t from her husband. Penny ran to the breakout room to warn Alisha and Asha of the presents that surely awaited them.

This is the Chronicles of Creepy Pants.

Stay tuned for Episode 23: Donut King

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2 thoughts on “Episode 22: My Funny Valentine

    • Why thank you, kind sir! Be sure to post a link on your social networking sites and broadcast the creepiness to the virtual masses!

      (I don’t have an advertising budget).

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